Wow, so I don’t post for a couple of weeks and now that I’m getting back into the swing of life post-holidays, Emerson has had me up like alllll night the past week on account of her two front teeth coming in. And, let me to you, when mama is pushed past her normal state of exhaustion into the realm of delerium….well….it’s tough to formulate thoughts and write. In the meantime, a quick installment of “This is our Life:”

My dream mornings consist of being able to shower, towel off, lotion up and get dressed all without the baby in the room/in my arms/pulling on my leg/somehow attached to my boob while doing all of the above. Those mornings are a rarity, though, and this is not one of them. This is my standard morning, so I am starting out my bathroom routine with Emerson in her bouncy seat next to me. About ten minutes later, Alex comes and takes her to play downstairs just as I step into the shower. This is also not one of the mornings on which I have the luxury of washing my hair (those are also a rarity) so I shove my hair back into the large, purple shower cap that my daughter is all too familiar with and I fear will always associate me with. I soap up, wash my face, and then spend twenty seconds just standing in the warm water before I remind myself that I can’t stand there all day. 

As soon as Alex hears the loud, metal-on-metal sound of the shower curtain being opened, he is already halfway up the stairs. On this occasion, I decide to close the door before he has a chance to come in. But, my personal space barely exists anymore. Alex simply opens the door without knocking and proceeds to drop Em in her bouncy seat so he can get in the shower himself. Slightly annoyed, but also resigned to my existence, I blurt out, “a closed door means I’m doing something private!”

Alex looks at Emerson and says, “what do you think she was doing in here, Em?” Emerson looks perplexed. “Probably something with her vagina,” he whispers.

Alex and I go back and forth about my top secret private acts for a minute until Alex says, “you’d think that there wouldn’t be anything private between you and the man that literally pulled a baby out of your vagina.”

I had nothing to say to that.

This is our life.