Anything that progresses or can be accomplished in a linear fashion is comforting. It’s predictable, logical, and the end point tangible and rewarding. Unfortunately, none of these things describe parenthood, and that is why I often feel like I might lose my mind.

If you frequent my blog, I’m sure you’ve noticed my lack of posting these past two weeks. And the reason for this unintentional hiatus is my unpredictable daughter. Nap time (aka the time I use to write this blog) has been totally shaken up. I had (so illogically) come to rely on this time. I’ve always had a chunk of hours, every day, without question. But, as of late, I have  found myself fighting with my toddler to go to sleep, spending nap time with her lying directly on top of me (and if not, she refuses to sleep), and this week I’ve had the pleasure of also experiencing motherhood without any naps during the day.

Let me just say, mothering a toddler who doesn’t take a nap is just not fair.

Let’s also throw in the mix the fact that I’ve been dealing with a child screaming in pain in the middle of the night (thank you to those three teeth that are currently ruining our lives!). So, when I have managed to get my toddler to nap, I have subsequently passed out on the floor, unable to accomplish anything on account of terrible nights of sleeplessness.

It’s not linear. We had figured out how to take one three-hour long nap every day. We were getting so good at sleeping in a toddler bed without mama. We were nursing less. We were sleeping more. And then boom! Parenthood. I was fooled by what looked like a straight line, and got way too comfortable, before promptly being reminded that parenting isn’t that simple.

So, we ride on. Up. Down. Over. And over. (And probably over, again). And we remind ourselves that it won’t always look like this. It can’t possibly. The roller coaster will continue, of course, but the details of today that seem immovable will one day vanish. (I’m hoping that day is tomorrow).